but I did it anyway.
Today it is hot. Well not so much hot, but humid. Sweaty breasticles humid.

I hate humid. I hate hot. But you already knew that….

So I am in Boo’s room looking under his bed for his McDonalds Chicken McNugget box (the kid collects fast food containers….. yeah weird, but if you can’t eat it you may as well sniff the boxes. Same ingredients anyway…) and I was feeling really hot.

So I pulled my skirt up around my waist.

So there I am. Skirt around my waist. Butt in the air. Looking under the bed.

‘Hello?’ an unfamiliar MALE voice calls.

I thump my head on the base of the bed.

A father from school, dropping off some photos of Boo is standing at the OPEN FREAKING WINDOW!

‘Um, am I interrupting anything?’ He inquires, his eyes bugging out of his head, a flush in his cheeks.

I choose to pretend nothing happened.

‘No, just looking for something for Boo, come in!’

Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck. At least I was wearing pretty panties today. And they weren’t lacy.

So he dropped off the photos and I saw him out.

As he wandered down the driveway, he turned and gave me a sly smile.

Yeah buddy, we both know what you saw. Lets never speak of it.

Unless you want to blog about it. That is fine. Just remember to mention how fabulous, tight and undimpled my arse is OK? And I will say that you are one hot Daddy….

Something else that makes me want to run and hide in a cupboard.

I picked up Boo from school, I was a bit distracted after watching Jenny McCarthy on Oprah (more on that later when I calm down a tad) so I just got him and we went to the supermarket.

I was hobbling around with Boo flapping his arms and people staring.  Yeah, asshat, stare all you like I was thinking.

By the end of it I was getting rather agitated.  People were just STARING.  Some smiling and gigling.  One person actually freaking POINTED at me.

Oooh I was really peeved.

I got home, unpacked the shopping, gave my Boo a big squeeze and took off my shoes to give my toe some relief.

Then nature called.  As I got into the bathroom I realised my fly of my pants was undone.

My black pants.

Bright blue lacy panties.

I looked in the mirror.  Yep they were like a freaking beacon they were so bright against the black of my pants.

So people weren’t staring at my Boo.

They weren’t even commenting at my bizzare limping.

They were staring and laughing at the stupid woman who went shopping with her fly undone revealing bright blue lacy panties.

And they are really freaking lacy too.  So they got a REAL eye full.