I have noticed I have had a bit of a potty mouth lately.  More like a sewer mouth really.

So I thought I would attempt a post where I am not angry or picking on someone and I don’t swear.

So….

Ummmm…

How’s the weather there?

Ok, I’ve got something.

A couple of freaky things have happened today.

Today was the first day back at school after the school holidays!!!  Whooo Hoo!  I was waiting out front of Boo’s classroom when Boo’s teacher arrived.  He had a hair cut!  F…….far out. (see I can do it!)

Boo’s teacher has had the weirdest hair.  Sorta mullet crossed with a birds nest of matted hair plopped on the top of his head and held in place with a couple of litres of yellow coloured goo.  Oh man, it was horrific.  Rumours flying around the school was that either he was bald and plonked all that on his head to hide it or he had a huge growth on his head.  Either way it would have been better than what he had.  Especially when it started melting during the sports carnival.

But today he looked great!  Bit greyer than I was expecting (well the other hair was yellow-goo coloured) but short and neat.

He was the talk of the playground.  Groups of mums – and a few dads – huddling together marvelling at how good he looked.  A couple of ‘he looks fantastic’ and even a few ‘He is hot’ (well there were a few expletives but I am being good today remember?).

P has a great body and is a nice looking man.  It was just the monstrosity on his noggin’ that was letting him down.  I think he will have a few mums requesting him as a teacher next year!  So now not only is he a gift from God as a teacher, he aint too bad on the eye either.

******

Rang my mum today.  She had the builders over doing the finishing touches on McMansion. Let’s not go there about the McMansion, cause then I won’t be able to keep my promise.

  The builder baked her a cake.

You heard (read, yeah whatever) that right. The. builder. baked. her. a. cake.

Totally blew my mind.  Apparently he likes to dabble in cake baking and decorating in his spare time.  A dark chocolate, strawberry and mascapone cake.  No f…., ahem,  cake mix.  From SCRATCH!

Took me a while to process that.  Then she said,

It was the third one he had made her and dad.

*stammer* um, gulp, wow?  Nah. For goodness sake? Nah, used that already. Um.

Isn’t that unexpected?

Now I need to go and have a rest cause this post was really bloody hard.

Shit, I swore.

Shit.

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