I shouldn’t have hauled my bottom off my chair and saved him from a fate worse than Mama Cass earlier. I admit my main concern was my carpet, but I saved him all the same.
And what thanks do I get? Shit and toothpaste. He has added a new one to the mix, mouthwash. Two whole bottles down the drain and refilled with Diet Pepsi. And the pepsi bottle being topped up with water.
Oh and lets not forget him trying to cut up the lounge suite with a play doh knife.
And pouring left over soft drink from the weekend all over the newly polished (in a fit of domestic-ness on the weekend) stainless steel GAS cooktop.
And wiping his arse on his doona.
And the wall – yes the FREAKING wall!!!!
And forgetting to pull down his pants before he went to the toilet. While still wearing his only pair of shoes that he will deign to wear……
And making 8 ham sandwiches and leaving them in various states of crumbled-up-ness around the house.
And running into his sister while she is carrying a plate of scrambled eggs and giggling while it flies through the air screaming ‘Do it again, Do it AGAIN!!!!’
Surprisingly he didn’t put up his usual fight when I DEMANDED he to go to bed. Normally it is a 45 minute all in brawl to get him in the general vicinity of his bed, tonight it took all of 10.
Methinks this kid is playing with me. Methinks he knows when he has overstepped the line. Something I should rejoice. Apparently. He is being a naughty little boy, just like every other boy. Apparently.
Apparently it is illegal to strangle your child for being naughty. Even if they are almost as tall as you and stronger than 10 men.
But what if I just shake him a little?
Oooooooh, he is asleep. 10 minutes and he is asleep. Tiny little snore escaping from his lips. Spread eagled across the bed tangled up in the bedding. The pikachu bedhead I made him framing his tousled curls. Perfectly angelic sleeping face. I lean over and kiss his still baby-chubby cheek.
God how I love this child. All is forgiven.
At least for tonight.