Now that I have sent everyone on a guilt trip, vowing never to complain again (did you read the disclaimer at the start of the post?????) I thought you would like to hear about someone who could sleep through armageddon, wake up and go ‘Hey, so what’s to eat?’
DH can sleep ANYWHERE. I mean it. Any-freaking-where.
Floors of hospitals -
tiled or carpeted while on ‘watch’ when one of our kids was in there for ‘insert ailment here’ Doctors and nurses stepping over him. Floor buffers just rolling him out of the way.
Nightclubs -
stairwell – took me 2 hours to find him, thankfully the bouncers knew us and one was watching out for him
the making out couches – with people mauling each other next to him
out the front – waiting for me to come out….
Christmas Day -
in front of the tree while the kids were opening their presents
at the freaking table while eating!
On the floor while talking to the relies
sneaking off to the bedroom
Parties -
as before, sneaking off to the bedroom – no matter that he doesn’t even know the hosts
in the backyard under a tree
in the corner, next to the stereo
At work-
during a especially long song
in a meeting
at the office Christmas party
But the one that I never let him forget, that I bring up constantly, that he will pay for for the rest of his natural life……
IN THE HOSPITAL, ON THE BED WHILE I WAS IN LABOUR FORCING ME TO WRITHE IN PAIN ON THE FUCKING FLOOR!
and here is a picture!
The nurses thought it was funny. Adorable even. Me? Not-so-much.
Minutes later his testicles were in a vice grip. Coincidence?
So needless to say he is not helpful during Boo’s midnight soirées. He is just bloody lucky he makes a mean latte in the mornings.
* as an aside, some fabulous news. Boo slept through the night last night, methinks he has been reading my blog and deigned to give me a good nights sleep.
October 7, 2007 at 9:53 pm
Oh, that takes the cake!
October 7, 2007 at 11:20 pm
unbefreakinlievable!!! And I thought my hubby would sleep anywhere. I’ll never say that again after reading about yours! Pity you can’t train Boo to pee on your DH when he’s sleeping at the wrong times……….. (smirks an evil smirk)
will still pray for monday sleep through
October 8, 2007 at 8:56 am
You and I have talked about this before… Mine didn’t get the bed though, he had to make do with 2 hospital chairs.
October 8, 2007 at 9:06 pm
One night I woke up (about 330am) to DH talking on the phone, he was talking to the police. This night we had rain and across the road was getting ready to erect a concrete warehouse. This came on a truck and trailer, and they left the trailer park on the side of the road. When I asked DH what was going on and he motioned for me to go outside. when i did, i almost fell over as a crowd of 20 people were standing on the front road to see the trailer had tipped with a great bang the concrete wall smashed all over the road! that woke the 20 people around me..
my now EXDH always reminds me of that night and laughs..
Lisa
October 8, 2007 at 10:02 pm
I have to admit that I woke up one night thinking that I must have sleep walked into a pub! Someone in our street had a party and the kids had wandered up our way. The noise from their chattering was a dull roar. Well except for the screams for mercy from one young bloke that had me calling 000, but hubby slept through it all.
October 9, 2007 at 3:28 am
Snort. Mine left to get a VCR. I will never let him live it down. Asshat. Can I cuss on your blog too?
October 9, 2007 at 9:43 pm
Mary Beth: Yeah impressive isn’t it….not
Bettina: Ooh that is an idea. Perhaps just slap him around the head with Boo’s wet night nappy? Dunno what happened with the Monday sleep through the night. He slept 2 hours.
Angel: Yeah! I remember. Bloody men.
Lisa: That is too funny. Now I am going to pick on you about it too! Bwaaaa haaa haaa
girl: You can definitely ‘cuss’ here! You are adding to my new favourite words list! Well I suppose my husband didn’t actually leave….. he would have worn the VCR though.